OH GEORGE................HANG ON A MINUTE........

So the gamblers dens that we call the Stock Exchanges have all decided to imitate rabbits in the headlights. Cries of "Don't panic Mr Mainwaring!" were heard on the floors this week as the money men decided to try and rip each other off......... caused, we are told, by low interest rates leading to high borrowing leading to unsustainable customer spending....... So the Fed's response? - lower interest rates leading to continued high borrowing leading to increased consumer spending. I'm assuming we're too thick here to understand......................

It just goes right over our heads really.

PINT PRICES SET TO BANKRUPT DRINKERS!

So here we are again, with the trade telling us that the price of a pint of the brown stuff will soon be- and we quote "Bloody Scary" and "pant fillingly scary" - so we decided to work it out (we don't normally bother with all this accounting stuff, if we've paid the bills and there's money left - it's ours....... )

Hops cost around 1p per pint, so if the price triples then that's 3p, malt costs around 6p per pint so if that increases by 50% the cost of producing a pint of beer will increase by 5p - so how do we get to the £4 pint? - answers on a postcard.............